"Uncle Neil"  

 

A Child Learns What He Lives 

I remember seeing a bit of verse posted in a teacher's office when I was in elementary school. It made quite an impression on me. It was almost as though I had seen one of the adult secrets. By the time I saw it again in middle school or high school (or possibly both,) I in my (imagined) sophistication saw it (or wanted to) as cliche and almost laughable, but I remained riveted by it. Of course, I was never going to be a teacher, not me!

There have been many versions of this poem in print, and many may be found on the web today. Most are unattributed, but at least three authors have been cited. At least one publisher, as well as several authors, have asserted copyright. And dates of origin from the 1950s to the 1990s have been claimed.

After a fair amount of research, it seems clear to me that the original author was Dorothy Louise Law, later known as Dorothy Law Nolte, and it was written sometime in the 1950s Sources differ on the details. It was written either in 1954 or 1955 for the Torrance (CA) Herald, or in 1959 for a Torrance public schools newsletter.

Were this written now, female children would be included, for which we may be glad. And some of the words could surely be quibbled over. But at the very least it gives us, fifty or so years later, something to think about. Here is, as far as I know, the original version:

If a child lives with criticism, he learns to condemn . . .
If a child lives with hostility, he learns to fight . . .
If a child lives with fear, he learns to be apprehensive . . .
If a child lives with pity, he learns to feel sorry for himself . . .
If a child lives with ridicule, he learns to be shy . . .
If a child lives with jealousy, he learns to feel guilt . . .

BUT

If a child lives with tolerance, he learns to be patient . . .
If a child lives with encouragement, he learns to be confident . . .
If a child lives with , he learns to be appreciative . . .
If a child lives with acceptance, he learns to love . . .
If a child lives with honesty, he learns what truth is . . .
If a child lives with fairness, he learns justice . . .
If a child lives with security, he learns to have faith in himself and those about him . . .
If a child lives with friendlienss(sic), he learns the world is a nice place in which to live . . .


WITH WHAT IS YOUR CHILD LIVING? 

 510-865-8058               neil@uncleneil.com


 

 

All photos used with knowledge and consent of children's parents and of the respective photographers.